Nature wants me to stay fat.

In an effort to help along this whole weight-loss thing (particularly since I can't seem to get on track with the working out -- although I'm not giving up), I've been really trying to eat well.

So, I've been eating good food, food that's high in fiber, fresh food whenever possible, lots of fruits and vegetables. But it has to taste good, too, or I just won't eat it. Life's too short, etc.

I also have the added obstacle of needing to eat lunch and dinner at work three times a week (my one-hour commute puts me home too late to eat dinner). So it has to be something either warm-up-able in the microwave, or something that's good cold.

Last weekend I was cruising our grocery store and happened upon a giant pile of avocados. I HEART me some avocados. And I suddenly thought: These would be perfect. I'll get a loaf of fibertastic bread, some sprouts and some avocados, and I'll have myself the healthiest sandwich this side of the Mississip'.

Yesterday, I assembled said sandwich for the first time. Ohhhh, it was heavenly. The avocado was juuuuust the right amount of ripe: slightly squishy but not slimy. And it went so perfectly with the bread (something called Double Fiber; you're welcome, colon!) and the sprouts that my mouth was watering in between bites. SO GOOD. (Just looking at the picture at the top of this post, I want another one RIGHT NOW.)

Then, about 15 minutes after I'd finished it, I started feeling weird. I started coughing a little, and I realized my throat was scratchy. I had that weird, itchy feeling I get when I'm having an allergic reaction to...oh, crap.

I'm allergic to a LOT of plants. Like, not anaphylactic shock allergic, but itchy skin, watery eyes, nose burning allergic. Grass, trees, most outdoor plants. As I've grown older, this has started expanding to include a lot of raw vegetables, too.

And, now, apparently it also includes raw avocados.

Really, nature? Really? Do we really have to go through this again, like that time with the raw carrots when I nearly clawed the back of my throat just to stop it from scratching and got that awful pit in my stomach? Why are you doing this to me? And I thought avocados were a FRUIT, anyway. What is up with that?!

Ugh.

Of course, this never happens when I eat guacamole. Only the healthier fresh avocados.

See? Nature wants me to stay fat. Maybe she's freaking out because she made it so cold in Florida that they can't grow tomatoes and oranges or whatever, so she's trying to keep us addicted to fried things and trans fats so she can restock her wares or something. Well, I don't care. Scratchy throat be damned, I'm eating the avocados. Eat THAT, NATURE.

On a side note, while I was searching Google Images for that lovely beauty shot of the avocados, I saw a few glorious pictures of avocado trees. TREES FILLED WITH AVOCADOS. Somehow, I have never once envisoned where avocados come from, and never even thought about the existence of avocado trees. Can you imagine walking out into your yard and just grabbing an avocado anytime you want?! We have a pear tree, but you can only eat so many pears. But according to Wikipedia, avocado trees can only grow in tropical-type climates. Of which Ohio is decidedly NOT one. Boo.

Google Images also had this picture of avocado milk, which intrigued me -- although I'm not sure why it's garnished with a dill pickle slice:

And, this one made me laugh. I didn't see it in context, but I'm assuming it's referring to the debate about all the "good fat" in avocados. Heehee.