Why do you use it? asks the social media loser.

Last night a friend/co-worker and I met with a former colleague of ours for coffee. The goal: Pick his brain for information about social media.

In the last year or so, this former colleague has become something of an expert in using social media to promote business and personal goals, boost sales, gain awareness, etc. Facebook, Twitter, RSS feeds, blogs... All of it. He's written articles and even been asked to give lectures at local universities and civic organizations about the topic.

So we asked him last night: How does one become an expert in this stuff?

His answer: "Uh, I'm not really sure. You just kind of have to get in there and do it."

I'll be the first to admit that I've been overwhelmingly late to jump on the social media bandwagon. (I didn't start a blog OR join Facebook until 2009, and I have yet to be convinced about the relative merits of Twitter.) I can point to several reasons for this reluctance to join the crowd:

I'm usually reluctant to join the crowd. Mostly I just hate people telling me what I SHOULD be doing. The surest way to get me to AVOID doing something is to tell me that everyone else is and I should be, too. Most of the time, this reaction has little or no logic behind it. I'm just stubborn for no good reason. This also kept me from trying to be a vegan in college which (no offense to my wonderful vegan and vegetarian friends) I'm actually happy about.

It's just ONE MORE THING for me to do. I always assume that, whatever it is, it's going to take waaaaaaay too much of my time. Since moving from a job where I had absolutely no life outside of work to a job that actually affords me some balance in life, I tend to guard my personal time very jealously--clearly, sometimes to the detriment of pursuing new opportunities and/or plain old fun.

The actual "social" aspect of things. I have a wonderful group of friends, and am always open to making new ones. However, there are some folks I'd rather not reconnect with, y'know? I know that sounds terrible, but it's true. And I know, I know -- it takes less than a second to click "Ignore" if someone tries to "friend" me and I want to run away screaming when I see his/her name. I didn't say these reasons were rational.

But now I'm faced with certain facts that make it pretty much impossible to maintain my stonewalling of all things social media:

• I want to stay in touch with family and friends, and Facebook is the easiest, quickest way to do that.
• I want to be able to write outside of my "real" job, and a blog seemed like the most logical way to do that.
• I want to research and, eventually, promote the children's books I'm writing, so I need to join children's author discussion groups and figure out how to (eventually) create a fan page and a website for my books.
• Social media is becoming an increasingly hot topic at work, so I have to make sure I understand the various elements so I can maintain that competitive edge. :)

In other words, life has dragged me, kicking and screaming, into the present. Or, at least, 2006.

So, in the interest of my continued research (and because I value your opinions)...

What do you think?

1. Do you use social media ?

2. If so, which elements do you currently use?

3. Why do you use them?

4. Which ones do you think work the best for what you're trying to accomplish (whether that's staying in touch with family, making new friends, promoting your business, etc.)?

5. Have you abandoned any along the way (e.g., is anyone still using MySpace)?