It's times like these...

...when I'm so glad my own wedding is OVER.

I absolutely love being married. Love it. We just celebrated our 7th anniversary, and T. and I could not be happier.

But the actual wedding... Don't get me wrong -- it was LOVELY. It was a great day, no drama to speak of, quick and beautiful, all our family and friends, great food... Nothing to complain about.

It's the planning.

We had a relatively simple wedding, which worked well for us. We each had a few things we felt strongly about, so we compromised on those things, and T. pretty much deferred to me on everything else. My mom and I arranged for the flowers and the food, we each took care of our own attire, and the reception was at the church, so there was very little to do in terms of logistics.

And even that was exhausting.

Yesterday, as I often do on Sundays during football season, I fled my house (and my darling aforementioned husband) to spend the afternoon writing at Panera. I love everything about this: The bagel I eat before I start writing, the peace/companionship-at-a-distance that comes with working in a public place, the cozy atmosphere at Panera. It's just lovely.

This time, the table next to me was occupied (for the entire four-hour duration of my stay) by a 20-something girl and two older women. When I first arrived, I thought they were teachers planning a lesson, since they had folders upon folders upon binders upon papers strewn across three tables and were in heated debate about something.

Then I caught a glimpse of the title on one of the binders: "The Complete Wedding."

For the next three hours, I listened as this poor girl (and what turned out to be her mother and her fiance's mother) battled through a whole host of issues: Should they have the wedding outside? Well, but the groom wants to be outside. Should they have little umbrellas for the drinks? What drinks should they offer? Should there be drinking? Who would be upset if there's no drinking?

Friends, it was EXHAUSTING. By the end of it, the two mothers actually had to give the bride a pep talk because she was so overwraught by the whole thing, she was starting to break down. (I think one quote was, "If he calls off the wedding because you chose chicken instead of steak, then he doesn't deserve you.") And I'm pretty sure I heard them say the wedding is in May, so the poor thing has seven more months of this!

No judgements from me, because our wedding was stressful enough, and I know it's really, really easy to get bogged down in pleasing everyone else. But when did weddings become so far removed from the actual PURPOSE of the day and more about this huge brouhaha?

You know, I say that, and I could say everyone should elope and get married in a quiet ceremony with only immediate family in attendance, but if I had it to do over again -- I wouldn't change a thing. :)

I probably should have told that to the frazzled bride-to-be next to me. Huh. Maybe I'll see her next Sunday. I have a feeling she's in for a loooong seven months.